Why I wrote this book

Hello everyone,




I wanted to share with everybody why I became a writer and why I decided to write this memoir on my mom. It all started when I was a little kid in good ole Jonesville, Michigan. At a whopping population of approximately 2,500 people, Jonesville is a little town in Hillsdale County close to the Ohio and Indiana borders. 


My parents were teachers (my mom would later become an elementary school counselor) and I was encouraged at a very early age to read and write. Sure, my parents would buy us the occasional video game or toy, but for the most part they bought me books for Christmas and birthdays. Whether it was Tom Sawyer, Huck Finn, Oliver Twist, or the Hardy Boys, I could be found somewhere in our house reading my next adventure. 


Growing up in Michigan, I played a ton of sports as well. However, for practically 3-4 months out of the year, it is too cold and snowy to play anything outside. When I wasn't in school, I was reading and writing little short stories of my very own. My parents stated that I was very creative and inquisitive from an early age. I was always asking questions about the world around me. My mom stated that I got bored with toys and video games so I would write and just make up stories for fun. 


In high school and college I loved to write as well, but I never took it that serious. I wrote poems, song lyrics, and lyrics for rap songs as well. I loved to write. I felt like it was something I was good at. I believe that people are smart in different ways. I couldn't fix a car. I couldn't solve a complex algebraic equation. I wasn't very good at chemistry and biology. However, I could write pretty well. And it was fun to let my imagination run wild. 


Right after I turned twenty-one years old, my mom passed away in a tragic car accident. She was the number one person in my life. She was an angel living on earth. She loved my family more than words  can describe. Also, as an elementary school counselor, she was able to impact kids in a very positive way. At Christmas time, she would go to Wal-Mart and buy toys and clothes for underpriviledged kids in the community. It's not like my parents were rich either. They were teachers so they didn't have a lot of extra money. She did it out of the kindness in her heart. 


This May will be the 10-year anniversary of my mother's death. As a celebration to her life, I decided to write a memoir about how she impacted us as a family. I started this memoir in July of 2011. It has been several months in the making. I am looking forward to publishing my memoir next month. I'm not sure on the exact date yet. It will be sometime in May though. Most likely, it will be released through Amazon in the middle of the month. I am really looking forward to this celebration. This book is dedicated to my mom. Anyone who has lost a loved one or been through anxiety and depression can relate to this book. As always, thanks for listening to me. 


“Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it”  Charles R. Swindoll

What kind of impact do you want to make?

Hello everyone,

My mother always thanked the kids for coming to our sporting events in high school. Her relationship with the students she counseled was always a very strong one. She modeled the way that a counselor and a teacher should act as a professional. Whether she saw the kids at school or out in the community, she would always take time out from her day to chat with them. She wouldn’t just make small talk. She genuinely cared about these kids and would stop and really ask them how they were doing. She would ask the kids how they were feeling.  

Unfortunately, a lot of the students that she dealt with didn’t have a good parent in their life. They didn’t really have anybody to look up to. Not only did they see my mom as their counselor; they saw her as a friend, mother, and a parent.  

She led by example on the proper way of treating people. She didn't care what ethnic background somebody was. She didn't care if they were poor or rich. She judged people on the way they treated others. I learned how to treat people with dignity and respect from her. I learned from her not to judge a book by its cover. 

“Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it”  Charles R. Swindoll

Carlos Rubio my father-in-law

Hello everyone,


Yesterday was the one year anniversary of the death of my father-in-law Carlos Rubio. We celebrated his life by going to Clearwater Beach to swim and play in the sand with the little one. The following paragraphs describe the first time I met Carlos and how he impacted my wife and I. 

As we pulled in the driveway, Carlos was standing outside on the porch. He immediately smiled at me and shook my hand.  I thought, okay that was a relief. I didn’t get smacked or run off the property. So far so good. As we sat on the couch and engaged in a conversation, Carlos apologized because he said his English wasn’t very good. I begged to differ. I could understand his English fine. I told him I wished I was more fluent in Spanish. He said, "this is America, you shouldn’t have to learn spanish." Carlos was a very generous person.  He didn’t need to apologize to me for anything. However, he was such a caring person that he was always looking out for somebody else’s needs. 

 Carlos was a very instrumental person in Patricia’s life and I’m so very thankful for the way that he raised her. She is definitely a better person because of her father and the positive mindset that she exhibits on a daily basis has made me a better person as well. I am so proud of Patricia and she is a strong person because of her father and her mother as well.  

Carlos was a very well-rounded man and it was very evident from all the various conversations that I had with him over the last couple years. He loved to talk about movies, music, art, history, the world, and politics as we know it. For his birthday just this past February I bought him the movie 2012. He asked me what I thought about it and we discussed the movie. He then preceded to ask me if I believed the world would end in 2012. I told him no. He started smiling and laughing and he said I don’t believe in that crap either.  However, one thing that Carlos did believe in was loving your family and there is nothing more important than that. While I still have many goals in life that I want to achieve both personally and professionally, he reminded me that there is nothing than important than spending good quality time with your family.  

I will always cherish the moments I spent with Carlos. Although I’m very sad to see him leave this Earth, I’m also very happy he finally gets to meet my mom in heaven. Along with my mom, he will be re-united with his family and friends as well.  

Carlos I know you are looking down and I’ll promise I’ll help take care of Patricia and your family to the day that I die. In nomeni Patris et feli spiritus Sancti. Amén y Dios Bendice. 

“Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it”  Charles R. Swindoll

Feelings of Sadness and Despair

Hello everyone,




In a death, unfortunately, there is no next time. Not in this lifetime. You have to live the rest of your life knowing that you will never see that person again. For me-at least for a long time-I was the boy that woke up every Christmas morning, only to find out  there was no Christmas. There were no presents and there certainly was no happiness and joy. This would happen for a long time. 

For many months, this feeling of emptiness consumed me-consumed my every thought and emotion. Every reminder of the tragedy accentuated my feelings of loneliness and despair. I would get this sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. Unfortunately, this was just the start of it. Many things transpired after these initial feelings of sadness and despair.  

Even though I was going through my own problems and issues at the time, I still put a smile of my face. Smiling does not necessarily mean you’re happy. Sometimes it just means that you’re strong. I was very good at masking my sadness and depression. For the most part, I was very good at hiding my true feelings. When I did hang out with friends and family, I put on an act. I acted happy when I wasn’t. People thought I was happy when I simply felt distressed. 

 



“Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it”  Charles R. Swindoll

How would you cope with the loss of a loved one?

Hello everyone,

In every death, a new life for the loved ones left behind is created whether you like it or not.  There comes a point in time when people have to decide whether or not they are going to move on or stay put.  Will you let the feeling of their non-existence consume your thoughts and emotions or will the manifestation of their spiritual being provide a sufficient enough means to face life in the aftermath of their unfortunate departure?  

The effects of death can impact a person in a number of ways. How you let it impact your life could be the difference between happiness and depression. I came to the point in my life where I couldn’t simply live the same life I had been living for a few years.  

My mother was an elementary school counselor and I saw how much joy was brought to her over the years. Making a difference in a child’s life was the ultimate happiness for her.  

A friend of hers told me at her funeral that she had a very unique ability that not many possess. This particular friend was an elementary school counselor herself and admitted to me that she couldn’t do all the things that my mom could do. She stated that my mom had the ability to read the kids and really empathize with them. My mom cared about her students so much and that was obvious when you saw how the kids reacted to her when they saw her.  

I encountered a lot of ups and downs as a result of my mother's death. A lot of painful and impactful things happened after she passed. My book will go over all my experiences in extreme detail. Anybody that has ever lost a loved one, will be able to relate to it.  

“Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it”  Charles R. Swindoll

Jaime

Hello everyone,




I just wanted to write a quick message today and wish my cousin Jaime a Happy Birthday. She would have been 34 today. She passed away in a car accident a few years ago. She was a very strong person just like my mom. She was a great person and I know my mom and her are looking down on us from heaven.  










“Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it”  Charles R. Swindoll

Editing begins

Hello everyone,


I have officially finished the rough draft of my manuscript.  It is currently just over 52,000 words and 250 pages.  The ending of the book was extremely hard for me to write because it is pretty darn emotional.  However, I am very pleased with it.  


So now editing begins.  Needless to say, my manuscript will probably change multiple times as I edit and edit the heck out of it.  I have a buddy that is going to help me do it.  Also, I will most likely hire someone to do it too.  Editing for grammar is the easy part.  Editing for content will be a different story.  Although, I am very pleased with what I have, a few things are going to be shuffled around I'm sure.  I hope it's not too hard of a process.  My goal is to be done editing by the end of April.  The goal is to start getting it to the masses by May.  I can't wait!  I will keep everyone updated.  Furthermore, I am going to start putting various chapters from the book on here.  I hope you enjoy and thanks for reading.  







“Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it”  Charles R. Swindoll